Guide For New Kitty Cats

Welcome, new kitties! We found you at the shelter and could not leave you there. Now make yourself at home. Let us review a few house rules. Some are for you, and some are for me. Here is our guide.
Cat napping is legal here. If you find a place in the sun, score! Do not worry about the plant or the glass bell collection. Those things can be placed somewhere else, if they are not broken from falling out the window.

Warning! Also, legal here is cat nabbing. Holding cats hostage is not permitted, however. When you want down, get down.

People nabbing is common, too. Jump on my lap or my chest, but not my head, please.
Cats like to steal shiny things. They like to hide dimes and earrings. But people will come looking, and they will reclaim your prize, little one! Especially if you hid them in the sofa!

People are not trees. Do not climb your mamas’ nightgown to get to the food bowls.

I am not trampoline. Only bounce on me in the middle of the night if a burglar is prowling.
We live in a multiple cat household. We must share toys, and people, and windows. But we do not have to share our dinner. Each cat and person get their own dish. Keep your nose out of your sisters dish and definitely keep it out of mine.

Doors are closed for many reasons. Shoving your way in, or if you fail in that, pushing your paw under the door and wailing is not appropriate, though it is awful funny.
Scratching posts are available here. Please refrain from scratching on the other furniture.

Please do not heard us or dash before us as some of us cannot stop quickly and easily.

Humans, lids must be kept on all containers always, or kitties may reach into containers and pull out toys or trash at will.

Breakfast and dinner meals are to be served timely. Filling dry food bowls and water bowls are vital daily, as is litter duty.

These rules will help our house become your home and a comfortable place for us all. I have raised other kitties, but you are yourself and must be as individual as you are. Thank you for coming home with me. Now, go play!